Points to Ponder by booleannangel
booleannangel

Points to Ponder

by booleannangel in Fractal Manipulations

What My Mother Taught Me


My mother taught me
TO APPRECIATE A JOB
WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside -
I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me
RELIGION:
"You better pray that will
come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about
TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up,
I'm going to knock you into the
middle of next week!"

My mother taught me
LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me
FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an
accident."

My mother taught me
IRONY:
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about
the science of
OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about being a CONTORTIONIST
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there 'til all that
spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would
you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once,
I've told you a million times -
Don't Exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me
THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world,
and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about
ENVY:
"There are millions of less
fortunate children in this
world who don't have wonderful
parents like you do!"

THANKS, MOM!

Author: Unknown



Hope this makes you laugh!

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